[It should be, it should be, she should be—and yet, she can feel him seizing up, can hear how he repeats her name in a state of bliss, watching his boyish face grow rigid, for a time, while he spends his pale pleasure. Everything essential is there, for the essential finish of either man or woman: heat, friction, emotion, and all other manner of indecent things she cannot bear to name, the sort of words found in tawdry books she was never supposed to read, and was scolded for if she dared to mention, in the garden of her girlhood youth.
But the matter was, even as a bride, even as a wife, the crux of ecstatic joy eluded her most often, very often, in actuality. And it seems to have eluded her once more, tonight—perhaps, she wonders morbidly, if not as punishment. But why should she deserve punishment, for loving another man in this manner, if he loves her as she loves him? If this is no summer interlude, but something true, and wonderful, and pure, then—why?
The breath rushes from her lips, drinking shallow sips of warm air, remembering his gaze on her, and a wan smile curling at her lips. She leans up, pressing a languid kiss to his mouth, sweet and demure.]
Perfectly.
[She lies, but the language of deception or slight darkening of the truth comes as natural to her as being moneyed and pampered—after all, learning to flatter in any condition is essential, if she is to survive in the smothering metropolis of New York.]
no subject
But the matter was, even as a bride, even as a wife, the crux of ecstatic joy eluded her most often, very often, in actuality. And it seems to have eluded her once more, tonight—perhaps, she wonders morbidly, if not as punishment. But why should she deserve punishment, for loving another man in this manner, if he loves her as she loves him? If this is no summer interlude, but something true, and wonderful, and pure, then—why?
The breath rushes from her lips, drinking shallow sips of warm air, remembering his gaze on her, and a wan smile curling at her lips. She leans up, pressing a languid kiss to his mouth, sweet and demure.]
Perfectly.
[She lies, but the language of deception or slight darkening of the truth comes as natural to her as being moneyed and pampered—after all, learning to flatter in any condition is essential, if she is to survive in the smothering metropolis of New York.]